FOREWORD BY IRINA TWEEDIE

PART ONE: ACROSS THE CHASM OF FIRE

Chapter 1: Second Birth

Chapter 2: Perplexities and Premonitions

Chapter 3: Doubts

Chapter 4: More Doubts

Chapter 5: A Sign

Chapter 6: One of the Hierarchy

Chapter 7: Echoes from the Path

Chapter 8: Effortless Path

Chapter 9: The Mystical Sound

Chapter 10: Love is Produced

Chapter 11: Benares and Adyar

Chapter 12: Flight into the Unknown

Chapter 13: The Challenge

Chapter 14: The Four Doors

Chapter 15: The Dweller on the Threshold

Chapter 16: Curriculum Vitae of Sins

Chapter 17: Circulation of Light

Chapter 18: A Blank Check

Chapter 19: A Flaming Row

Chapter 20: Our People are Tested with Fire and Spirit

Chapter 21: The Stages of Love

Chapter 22: Casting out of a Spirit

Chapter 23: Mindless, yet One-pointed

Chapter 24: "The Sun Cannot Harm Me Either"

Chapter 25: Who Will Remember

Chapter 26: Drunk

Chapter 27: Those Who Are Dead Do Not Remember

Chapter 28: The Terror of Love

Chapter 29: The Turning of the Heart

Chapter 30: We Have Two Hearts

Chapter 31: Dhyana Is the First Step

Chapter 32: The Last Belief Must Go

Chapter 33: Is It God?

Chapter 34: Serious Illness

Chapter 35: The Most Difficult Year of My Life

Chapter 36: The Dream

Chapter 37: "You Have To Go"

Chapter 38: "Time and Space are Nothing to Us"

Chapter 39: "And the Grace of God Will Be with You"

Chapter 40: There Is No Luck, Only the Divine Grace

Chapter 41: Living with God

Chapter 42: The Great Separation

Chapter 43: Sitting Outside: A Self-discipline

Chapter 44: Suicide?

Chapter 45: Faith without Understanding

Chapter 46: Quite Poor, Nothing is Left

Chapter 47: Bandhara

Chapter 48: Took Some of His Hair

Chapter 49: A Saint Always Has a Light over His Head

Chapter 50: The Pain of Love

Chapter 51: Forebodings: The Killer Instinct

Chapter 52: "Never Hurt Anybody's Feelings"

Chapter 53: To Become Like Him

Chapter 54: "Try To Be Absorbed"

Chapter 55: One Must Be Able to Sleep in the Street

Chapter 56: Mounting Irritation

PART TWO: THE WAY OF NO RETURN

Chapter 57: Return

Chapter 58: The First Cloud

Chapter 59: What is Nearer - The Source or the Delta?

Chapter 60: Faith and Love are One

Chapter 61: The Story of a Wali

Chapter 62: Rebuff to a Bore

Chapter 63: Training of the Jinn World

Chapter 64: Tawadje

Chapter 65: Time Runs Short

Chapter 66: People Judge by Appearances

Chapter 67: The Divine Thread

Chapter 68: Testing Period

Chapter 69: Renal Colic

Chapter 70: Blessing of a School

Chapter 71: Dhyana?

Chapter 72: A Birthday Present

Chapter 73: The Test of Hunger

Chapter 74: Another Heart Attack

Chapter 75: The Test of the Acceptance of Death

Chapter 76: Resigned to Die

Chapter 77: His Anger

Chapter 78: Born of the Spirit

Chapter 79: To Endure and to Endure

Chapter 80: Hard Times are Passing Away

Chapter 81: The Pressure Increases

Chapter 82: Nothing but Nothingness

Chapter 83: Death

Chapter 84: Freedom

Chapter 85: Love and Faith Become One

Chapter 86: Himalayan Retreat

Chapter 87: Scorpion and Caterpillar

Chapter 88: The Snows and the Sound

Chapter 89: Seven Colors of the Rainbow

Chapter 90: Chorus of Voices

Chapter 91: Samarpan (Surrender)

Meditation